Thu
5
Mar
2009

The Power of Will

I looked in the bathroom mirror today only to learn that I have back fat.  Two creases in my sides that did not used to be there and which can only be created when the body has gained a considerable amount of fat.  Yes, folks, yours truly is overweight.  This is nothing new; I’ve been carrying a few extra pounds for quite some time but tonight I realized that I’ve let myself go a little too far.  Nearly fifty pounds overweight if my scale has anything to say about it.  Is it all that junk food?  Probably.  Lack of exercise?  No doubt.  Too many hours in front of the TV and computer?  Most likely.

My problem is similar to the millions of Americans who are also overweight or obese: excuses.

“I don’t have the time!” Bullpucky.  If you have time to read this blog, you have time to exercise.  It’s not a matter of time, it’s a matter of tenacity.

“I don’t have the income for a gym membership!” Hogwash.  You don’t need to go to a gym to exercise, nor do you need exercise equipment to exercise.  It’s not a matter of income, it’s a matter of intent.

“I don’t have the means to make healthy food!” Horsehockey.  Cereal for breakfast, salad for lunch, fish and rice for dinner, fruit for dessert.  It’s not a matter of means, but a matter of motivation.

“I don’t have the will power!” Poppycock.  Balderdash.  Tommyrot.  Will power is just a fancy phrase for determination.  If you were in a burning building, would you be concerned for your life?  Then you would have the will power to find the safest exit as you would be determined to survive.  If your child was failing in math, would you have the will power to help her study?  Then you are determined to see her succeed.

Are we determined to be healthy?  Are we determined to live active and fit lives?  Are we determined to lower our risk of diseases related to the condition of being overweight?  Well, I don’t know about you, but after seeing my back fat, I certainly am determined.

At the very least, I have the will power to believe that I am determined.  That may be enough until I can find the time to get a gym membership and make a salad.

By admin | Posted in Uncategorized | Comments (0)
Wed
25
Feb
2009

The Tax Man

Yesterday, President Obama, while discussing education, said that we not only let ourselves down when we don’t graduate, but we let down our country.  I think, that this point can be correlated to our financial situation.  If you forgot to pay your taxes or decided not to pay back your credit card, it’s likely that the world would continue on without much worry.  But if the entire country forgot to pay their taxes or decided not to pay back their credit card, that would be a different story.

Obama, continuing his speech last night, insisted that together, the country as a whole, has the capacity, the willingness and the desire to get this nation and our economy back on track.  With his stimulus plan, most of us will see tax breaks in our future.  And for many of us who have been let go of our position at work, we will likely see extended unemployment benefits and possible job openings.  But whether you have a job or not, there are plenty of things you can do to make sure you are as successful as possible with your current financial situation.

First of all, if you have lost your job, make sure to apply for unemployment insurance!  This is a great way to pay your bills until you can get your feet back on the ground!  If the situation gets dire, your State’s human services can provide you with food stamps and medical coverage (or provide you with information where you can receive cheap or free medical coverage).  For the disabled, veterans and the elderly, Social Security can also help you pay rent until things turn around.  If you own your home, you may even qualify in some instances for a second mortgage.  And, although this should be a last resort, don’t forget about your retirement accounts.  You’ll pay a penalty for withdrawing them before you retire, but if it comes down to it, it might save you from a worse situation.

Secondly, make sure you’ve got your finances in order!  Check your credit report!  You are entitled to a free report every year and it would be wise to see where you stand with your various financial institutions.  If you don’t already do so, create yourself a monthly budget.  Some banks offer financial programs on their website.  You can also download financial software from Quicken.  I, personally, use spreadsheet software with a few simple formulas.  Whatever works for you, use it.  There’s nothing worse than losing track of your transactions or not being aware of exactly how much you spend on bills, rent, mortgage and entertainment only to find that you’re not sure if have any money for that emergency doctor’s visit or a donation for your daughter’s recital or a night out with your spouse’s out-of-town family.  Or, you pay that doctor’s bill, make that donation and go out for those drinks only to find your bank account is now in the red!

Lastly, if you have the means, save!  Open up a savings account and save.  When you’re at the grocery store, buy the cheaper cereal and put the money that you saved on the purchase into your savings account.  Instead of going out every weekend, go out every other weekend and put that money into your savings account.  If you receive unexpected cash, say, from a birthday or shower, put that money into your savings account instead of the checking account.  Better yet, open up a money market account and reap the interest rewards!  Once you’ve saved at least 6 months of your monthly take home pay, start putting the rest of your savings into the stock market.  Sure, the market is doing terrible right now.  But, as the old saying goes, the best time to put money into the stock market is when it’s down because 1) the market will almost certainly rebound and 2) when the market starts gaining again, you’ll catch the wave!

This is a start!  And surely, the President’s intiatives will help us all out, too.  But until they do, we need to make sure we’re doing everything to keep ourselves afloat.   Not only for ourselves, but for our country!

By admin | Posted in Uncategorized | Comments (0)
Sun
15
Feb
2009

The 53 Day Challenge

A friend of mine recently told the story about how many years ago she had a child who died shortly after being born.  As expected, this has had a long and lasting impact on her life.  The child survived 53 days and, as it were, my friend suggested that each of us aim to make a long and lasting impact in someone’s life in the next 53 days.  This, I thought, was an amazing idea.  And as many of us have just recently finished up our annual celebration of love, it seems a perfect time to suggest the 53 Day Challenge.

Valentine’s Day is often about expressing our love to our spouses, our significant others, our friends and family, maybe even to our pets and plants.  But what about the rest of the world?  What about the starving children in Africa or the homeless man down the street?  What about the child with leukemia or the man with AIDS?  What about the soldiers in Iraq or the displaced families from New Orleans?   We spend hundreds of dollars on flowers and chocolate and candle-lit dinners but why not spend that money instead on charity towards a good cause?  Or instead of spending an entire day showering your sweetie-pie with heart-shaped gifts, why not offer your day donating blood or assisting the elderly?

So during this weekend of love, I offer you the 53 Day Challenge in honor of my friend and her son, Seth.  Of course, cherish your loved ones in the way that you see fit this Valentine’s weekend.  But remember that there are others out there who could stand to accept your warmth and compassion and who may benefit from your love in ways that, as my friend said, “ripple” throughout the rest of their life.  A simple act of love in the next 53 days may impact someone for their entire life.  Just imagine what you might accomplish.

By admin | Posted in Uncategorized | Comments (0)
Thu
5
Feb
2009

24 Hours

Today being my birthday, I would like to remind everyone the great significance of birthdays.  For our friends and family it is a time to celebrate you and all that you mean to them.  Perhaps you, too, are celebrating yourself.  Tradition sets that, during this celebration, we should eat cake and open presents on our birthday.  But the greatest gift on our big day is the gift of opportunity, however, one you certainly shouldn’t eat.

A birthday is here to remind us mostly that we’re still alive, that we’ve still got time to accomplish the things we set out to do.  Whether you’re turning 15 or 30, 45 or 60, you’ve still got a chance for success!  If you haven’t accomplished what you set out to do at 14, your quinceanera is a reminder to get off your butt.  If at 29, you still hadn’t got yourself out of that dead end job, your 30th is the chance to do it!  If at 44, you passed up on taking out that loan to open your own business, there’s no better time to do it than at 45.  And if at 59, you regretted never taking the trip to Europe, you can still apply for a passport at 60.

Age is but a number, they say!  I like to think of it as a clock chime, gently noting that the day is not yet over.  Most of us keep imagining that the clock reads 11:59, regardless of our age.  “How awful, I’m 20!”  “My youth is lost, I’m 30!”  “Better off dead at 40!”  “Over the hill at 50!”    But at 20, it’s just about 6am on the clock, and at 50, it’s only 3pm (based on average life expectancy in Western civilization).  Even at 50, you’ve still got 9 hours of your day to make things happen!

So from me and my family to you and yours, I hope your 24 hours of birthday celebration don’t go by so quickly and when the clock chimes midnight, you’ve had a successful run.

By admin | Posted in Relaxation, Uncategorized | Comments (0)
Sun
25
Jan
2009

The Medium is the Message

The word medium can take on many meanings.  A medium latte.  A medium steak.  A medium for spiritual contact.  A medium of communication.  A medium of artistic sense.

Regardless of how the term is used, the word implies a position of being in between two or more things.  A medium latte is between a small and a tall latte; a medium steak is between rare and well done; a psychic medium is what stands between a person and their dead loved one; a medium of communication is the technology that transfers information from one spot to another (for example, a TV set, a radio, a newspaper, this blog, they all exist between the person providing the information and the person receiving it).  A medium of artistic sense is a little more abstract but still works.  The medium an artist uses is what separates the artist from the observer.  For example, an artist can use paint or clay or metal or wood or any assortment of objects to get their point across.  This object or this substance is what stands between the vision of the artist and the opinion of the art critic.

So what is my point?  You may be asking yourself this very question by now.  My point is that all of us, every single one of us is a medium.  We are what is between our dreams and our success.  You may find yourself sitting on the couch contemplating how you’d like to get that job one day or write that book or make that sale or buy that home or call that person you met at the bar last night.  But what’s between the couch and that goal is your motivation and your will and your passion and your knowledge.  You can capitalize on this medium because you are in direct control of it.  People have capitalized on other mediums, be it a medium latte or a medium of television, but someone has had the initiative to take what’s in between and make something of it!

Now, what’s your motivation?  I don’t know; that’s for you to figure out.  What’s your passion?  I haven’t any idea but I bet you’ve thought about it.  And if you don’t have the knowledge to realize your dreams and contemplations, they’ve built colleges and courses to help you learn it all.

Mediums are what it’s all about.  So be a medium; a medium of success and hope and passion.  And if you can capitalize on it, you’ll end up a happy medium!

By admin | Posted in Uncategorized | Comments (0)
Thu
15
Jan
2009

The Winter Season

Walking down the street, it is not hard to feel depressed these days when the sun sets so early and the bitter winter chills you to the bones and at every street corner you find another business building up for lease or sale. People are losing their jobs left and right and there doesn’t seem much to be done about it. Sure, a new government administration is stepping in and promises to fix it all but who knows how long that will take! When you look at the want ads, there seems to be less and less every day. A man out on his luck has fewer and fewer options to survive. Sure, there’s unemployment, there’s welfare, there’s charity. But no self-respecting person would look at these things as a cure for their ailment. It’s nothing more than a stopgap until something better comes along. And who knows how long that may be?

But something better will come along. It almost always does. The saying is getting old now in the news circuit but there’s a glimmer of truth in it: The night is darkest just before the dawn. Which is another way of saying, just hang on a little longer. Don’t give up hope! In these hard times, it’s easy to give into desparation and it’s normal to question your purpose on this planet. But from the hardest times often comes the greatest success.

When our paths place us into uneven territory, we struggle. But that struggle, common to every person, is what motivates the best of us to create something anew with ourselves. If you give into the tough terrain, you’ll never see where the path intends to take you. You’ve let the journey beat you! But if you trust in yourself and in your loved ones and in the odds that you’ll eventually see the morning sun, then brighter days are ahead of you.

The winter months may have the darkest hours but there will always be a spring if you let it come. These economic woes may have us fear for our financial security but if you can suffer this gloomy season, prosperity will find you once more.

By admin | Posted in Uncategorized | Comments (0)
Mon
5
Jan
2009

The Curious Case of Entropy

There is a scene long into the film adaptation of The Curious Case of Benjamin Button where Benjamin Button mentions, “I was thinking how nothing last, and what a shame that is.”

Many would probably agree with Button.  Who hasn’t sighed when they break their favorite watch or screamed when their computer crashed or cried when their TV shorted out?  To paraphrase Benjamin’s mother, things do not last so that we can recognize how much we valued them.

But I think we can go further than this.  I think we can ultimately say that because things do not last they have no real intrinsic value in the first place.  Now before you dismiss that I could suggest someone’s personal computer has no value, please hear me out.  The value of a computer is not it’s physical manifestation but, like a beloved pet, it’s relationship to it’s owner.  And when it is gone, it will not be the gigabytes and circuitry that it’s owner misses but what the computer was able to achieve.

This goes the same for a TV or watch.  It is not the plasma screen or the hands on a Rolex that make it special but their ability offer you knowledge and entertainment.  Or perhaps they have sentimental value.  Or perhaps they were both expensive products that you like to show off to friends and family.  Whatever the reason, the value of it is not inherent in it’s physical make-up.

Take for instance a famous painting by any number of artists.  Let’s say Rembrandt as an example.  Somebody could repaint one of his self-portraits.  Somebody could make photocopies of the painting.  But why does an original painting sell for so much?  Because it is Rembrandt!  Rembrandt, the man!  When someone buys one of his portraits it is not because of the paint or the frame, it is because the painting was done by a man: Rembrandt Harmenszoon van Rijn.

So what is the measure of a man?  Is it what he has collected?  Is it how much he has collected?  Is it how much his collection is worth?  Or is it something less tangible?

What was Napolean or Hitler remembered for?  What was Aristotle or Nietzsche remembered for?  What was Newton or Edison remembered for?  What was Mozart or Beethoven remembered for?  For what they owned?  Or was it for what they did?

The measure of success is not necessarily a measure of what you’ve accumulated but a measure of what you’ve contributed to the world.  Think of all the great names in history and, generally, they will not be remembered for how many coins they’ve collected or how much land they own but how they used those coins and that land.  Warren Buffet will go down in history, not because he had money, but because he gave it a way to help fight disease.  Mother Theresa has gone down in history not because she was kind, but because of how she took that kindness to help those less fortunate.  Einstein went down in history not because he was smart but because of how he applied his smarts to the problems of physics.

The next time your computer crashes or your watch breaks or, heaven forbid, your television shorts out, remember them not for their components but for their contributions.  And, should one day, you pass on, we will all remember you for the same.

By admin | Posted in Achievements | Comments (0)
Thu
25
Dec
2008

The Holiday Spirit

Last week, I had a nasty cold: sore throat, sneezing, runny nose, stuffy nose (how one can have both I don’t know but I did).  I spent my weekend curled up in a blanket with mottled hair and a huge cup of hot cocoa.  When that didn’t work, I took a day off of work for an extra 24 hours of recuperation.  My wife came home that evening and was welcomed by a foul smell.  She sniffed her way around the apartment looking for the culprit.  It could have been the dishes in the sink stacked a mile high, it might have been the garbage full of dirty tissues, it possibly was the cat’s litter or even the clothes I had been wearing since Friday night.  But because my nose was all clogged up, I couldn’t smell a damn thing.  And for all know, I could have been sitting all day in this aromatic filth causing who knows what detriment to my already sickly state.

Fortunately she found the smell (it turns out it was an odoriferous concoction of all four) and promptly cleaned it up.

So, remember, whether you celebrate Bodhi, Christmas, Diwali, Hanukkah, Kwanzaa or just the Winter Solstice remember that this is a time of giving and thanks and helping those less fortunate.  Whether it’s simply cleaning up someone’s dishes, throwing out the trash and flushing cat excrement or it’s something on a more grander scale like giving your old clothes to charity, working at a soup kitchen and buying holiday gifts for poor families, just remember that success is determined not by how many things you’ve received in this lifetime but by how many things you have given to the world.

To that end, I wish you all good holiday tidings and the happiest of New Years!

By admin | Posted in Holidays | Comments (0)
Mon
15
Dec
2008

The Feeling and the Action

The other day I made a joke that my wife had a bad temper, expecting that she would be insulted by the comment and quickly grow, well, ill-tempered.  She did and I was amused.  “You don’t love me anymore,” she said half-mockingly.  A little light teasing seems almost required form in a marriage but it got me thinking: does being in love with someone mean the same as loving them?

Reading The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People, the phenomenally successful book on self-improvement by Stephen Covey, I came across a section where Stephen was in seminar on the concept of being pro-active.  An audience member spoke up about his relationship with his wife and how they no longer shared feelings for each other.

“The feeling isn’t there anymore?” I asked.
“That’s right,” he reaffirmed. “And we have three children we’re really concerned about. What do you suggest?”
“Love her,” I replied.
“I told you, the feeling just isn’t there anymore.”
“Love her.”
“You don’t understand. The feeling of love just isn’t there.”
“Then love her. If the feeling isn’t there, that’s a good reason to love her.”
“But how do you love when you don’t love?”

Stephen answered, “My friend, love is a verb.”  Quite true.  I love her.  The sentence starts with a subjective noun, ends with an objective noun and in between is a verb.  However, so often when someone says that they love another person they are not speaking in terms of doing but in terms of being.  And what they should actually be saying is that, rather than loving somebody, they are in love with somebody.  I’m in love.

To love, then, is a statement (and a bold one, at that) implying that your actions toward this person are unquestionably affectionate, nurturing, and respectful.  “Sacrifice,” Covey explains how to actually love another person.  “Listen…Empathize.  Appreciate.  Affirm…”  Love is both a feeling and an action, so let us not assume that feeling love and acting out of love are mutually inclusive.  One can love a child and, at the same time, do harm.  On the other end, one can commit acts of love without having feelings towards the person.

So, the next time you crack wise and your spouse or significant other looks at you incredulously asking, “Don’t you love me?” they’re not asking about feelings (although, that may be implied), they’re questioning your actions.

By admin | Posted in Love | Comments (0)
Fri
5
Dec
2008

Lord of the Ring of Roses

Every Thanksgiving, my wife and I find a window of free time, roughly about 12 hours worth, and sit through the extended version of The Lord of the Rings trilogy.  As we’ve seen each of the films dozens of times, we’re not always fixed to the TV screen.  We chat about characters, actors, the director, the novel, the upcoming adaptations of Tolkein’s expanded work, we make inside jokes, we discuss special effects, plot points, story lines, we cook up Thanksgiving leftovers, snuggle under a warm blanket, even nod off occasionally.  But what’s most important is that it makes us both happy and it’s relaxing.

There’s an old saying: “Don’t forget to stop and smell the roses.”  Often times, many of us forget to simply just stop what we’re doing and relax.  Life gets so hectic we forget to put away some time simply to chill out.  Bills, car repairs, house cleaning, picking up the children from after-school activities, work, those terribly boring social events you’re required to attend to kiss your bosses ass, those terribly boring employees you’re required to invite to your social events to kiss the board members asses, checking your stock portfolio, doing your taxes, family emergencies, basement flooding, grocery shopping, and your list could go on forever and a day.  We schedule in or find time for all of these important things but how many of us schedule in time to take a breather?

Now some of us may not have the liberty of 12 consecutive hours of free time.  Some of us only have 12 seconds.  And some of us have 12 days.  But regardless, one of the keys to a successful life is to  maintain a happy and healthy one, too.  Misery may love company but it often doesn’t breed success.  So take a moment, think of what would make you happy and schedule it in to your day.  Make it simple as the simplest pleasures (guilty or not) are generally the ones that keep us content (and sane).  My simple pleasure is a cup of coffee every morning.  Maybe that’s yours, too.  Or maybe it’s a chocolate bar or the next chapter in that book you keep telling yourself you’ll finish or playing tag football with your son, or maybe it’s catching up with a long lost friend, or taking your dog for a walk.  Maybe it’s watching the sunset or listening to Kanye West’s latest album.

Whatever it is you enjoy, just be sure that you make time for it at least once a day.  Even if it’s simply to stop for 12 seconds and smell those roses.

By admin | Posted in Relaxation | Comments (0)